Some of the advice I've been given on moving from Oregon to the deep south, in no particular order:
"You may have to buy some pointy shoes."
(If you don't get this, it may be because you don't know a lot of Oregonians. We like comfort. Picture a lot of clogs, or, as my friend from the south calls them, 'birth control shoes.')
"Myrtle Beach, huh? So, what kind of car do you drive?"
"A Honda Civic.""Oh, no, that won't do. What you need to do is go out and buy a Ford. Or a Chevy.""Either one?""Yeah, so long as you get a sticker for the back with Calvin pissing on the other one."
"Enjoy your last election in a blue state, lady.""So, I'm not really into church, but you can go ahead and assume that everyone you meet out here is way down with Jesus."
